After countless phone calls of students pitching their ideas, I have a plea to all you student filmmakers:

Don’t make your films about a student filmmaker making a film. This is probably the worst idea you could dedicate to celluloid. I know that sounds quite harsh, for it’s for your (and everyone else’s) own good. I can tell you this, because I…well, I made such a mistake. I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s true. And not only did I try that (and failed miserably, as you will too), but I also shot it all in my bare white-walled apartment and cast my boyfriend, two sins so frightening, so…so amateur that all copies of said film, with a nauseating overuse of a certain Air Supply song, were immediately destroyed. Learn from my mistakes, student filmmakers, and while you’re at it, please refrain from all use of bar scenes, "hip, young 20-somethings", cigarettes, drug use, suicide, alcoholism, poop jokes, Fight Club/Tarantino rip offs (let it go!), montages of people falling in love (why does it always involve tickling?) and relationship drama modeled after the nasty break up you had with that girl or guy who totally didn’t appreciate your mix cds (they’ll be much sorrier they left you for that other guy or girl if you make a good film). I know that’s a lot to avoid, but when you clear away all the overused crap, what you have left is more likely to make a decent student film. Just saying.

While we’re at it, maybe I’ll just extend this plea to Hollywood in general.

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