Office_001Behind this door, in a super-secret undisclosed location, is the newly relocated nerve center of the SAGIndie Empire.

That’s right. We’ve moved.

Would that I could reveal our exact whereabouts – but if I told you, Eliza would have to kill you (I’m squeamish). Suffice it to say, our Miracle Mile secluded redoubt is impenetrable.

However, as a service to our (twenty or so) readers, I’m going to take you inside this red door for an exclusive look at our new digs. Some of what you see may disturb you, but rest assured that everything that takes place within these walls has been vetted and cleared by lawyers for the Bush administration.

As you can see from this pic, we have much more room in which toOffice_1 read Defamer, drink coffee, and create this well-written but woefully under-read blog. Yes, we now have plenty of space in which to continue our work on behalf of you, the independent filmmaker.
It’s what we do.

The move-in process has gone smoothly, for the most part. Our cache of heavily redacted documents has been filed away, our extensive collection of blackmail photographs has been placed safely within the three-foot thick titanium walls of the SAGIndie Vault, and the restraining system we use to keep Paul from practicing his finely honed ninja skills on us has been installed, and awaits his return from New York City.

And yet, as in any organization, there are laggards – those insolent, lazy few who, through their lack of initiative (not to mention basic cleaning skills) threaten the efficacy of the group. Behold: Office_002      

Sad, isn’t it?

Happily, there are always those who, with pluck, drive, and super-developed organizational skills, counterbalance the low impulses of the blackguards of the world.

Look to the left for a case in point. Notice the clean, organized work environment, and how that environment engenders in this worker a confident, relaxed air. In this cubicle productivity is higher, work is of a superior quality, and, in contrast to the sad case above, vermin have no place to hide and multiply.

There is much else I could show you, but in this current world environment one cannot be too sure about security. We’ll have to hold on to some of our secrets, until the time is right – when evil is defeated (in November of 2008), and when someone cleans up their fricking workspace.

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